What makes a great parent?
A great parent is someone who strives to make choices in the best interest of the kid.
What can make a great parent is not just identified by the parent 's actions, but also their intention.
A great parent doesn't need to be perfect. Nobody is perfect. No child is ideal either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set the expectations of ours.
Successful parenting isn't about achieving perfection. But it doesn't imply that we should not work to that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children second. We function as important role models for them.
Top 10 Parenting Tips
Here are 10 tips that will help you be an even better parent, learn good parenting skills, and avoid bad parenting.
They aren't all that easy or quick.
And possibly nobody is capable of doing them all the time.
Although you may not necessarily do all of these things, however, the tips in this parenting guide can help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not just tell the child of yours everything you want them to do.
The most effective way to teach is to show them.
Human is an unique species in part because we can learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and incorporate them in to our own. Children, particularly, watch everything their parents do very thoroughly.
Thus, be the person you would like the child of yours to be - respect your kid, show them good attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Demonstrate your love.
There's no such thing as loving your child too much. To love them can't spoil them.
Just what you choose to do (or give) in the title of love can - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these items are given in place of real love, that's when you'll have a spoiled child.
Loving the child of yours may be as simple as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also hearing your child's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love is able to trigger the release of feel good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals can provide us a full sense of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the kid, will acquire resilience and also not to point out a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with around hundred billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create our thoughts, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we're. They are created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to see positive experiences themselves and provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they won't have the development type necessary for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Use a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive mind-set.
These positive experiences create excellent neural connections into your child's brain and create the memories of you your kid carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it appears to be hard to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior problems. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach the child of yours the morals of what is right and what is wrong.
Setting limits and being constant will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind when you set rules and implement them. Focus on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be an opportunity for them to learn for the future in a good manner, rather than to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Let your child realize that you will always be there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Children raised by parents who are consistently responsive have much better psychological regulation development, social skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us know already the importance of communication. Talk to your child and also listen to them carefully. By keeping an open line of communication, you will have a much better connection with the child of yours and your child will come to you when there's a problem.
But there's an additional reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work together to maintain a healthy body. When different regions of the brain are integrated, they can function harmoniously as a whole, meaning less tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, talk through troubling experiences. Ask your child to describe what happened and how they felt to develop attuned communication.
You do not need to offer solutions. You do not have to have all the answers to be a good parent. Simply paying attention to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using words that are simple are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us wish to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even people who had a good upbringing and a happy childhood may wish to alter several aspects of how they had been brought up.
But very frequently, when we open our mouths, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is an action towards understanding why we parent the way we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a real scenario. Try to be aware and change the behavior of yours the next time those issues come up.
Don't quit if you don't succeed in the beginning. It will take practice, lots of practice to consciously alter one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Pay attention to Your personal WELL-BEING
Parents require relief too.
Give consideration to your own well being to prevent parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things including the own needs of yours or the overall health of the marriage of yours are kept on the back burner when a kid is born. When you don't take note of them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to strengthen the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents are more vulnerable to fighting. Don't hesitate to ask for parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self care and stress management is important to revitalize the mind.
How parents take proper care of their child physically and mentally can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, the child of yours will suffer, also.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
Undoubtedly, to some parents, spanking is able to bring about short term compliance which sometimes is a much needed relief for the parents.
However, this method doesn't teach the child right from wrong. It only teaches the kid to fear outside consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to your kid that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or maybe hit is much more prone to fighting along with other children. They're more apt in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to resolve disputes.
Later on in life, they are additionally far more likely to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, worse parent-child relationships, mental health issues, along with domestic violence victims or abusers.
You will find a variety of more effective options to discipline that have been shown to be much more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What is the goal of yours in increasing a kid?
When you are like most parents, you would like the child of yours to excel in college, be productive, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy positive relationships along with you and some, be to care and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and satisfying life.
Though just how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you're like most parents, you most likely spend the majority of the time simply attempting getting through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in their book, The Whole-Brain child, rather than helping your kid thrive, you spend most of time simply trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you're feeling angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration will do for you or your child.
Instead, look for ways to switch each bad experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be transformed into invaluable brain-sculpting moments if you focus on teaching your child, not attempting to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I don't mean shortchanging your child with tricks. What I mean is to take advantage of what's currently known by scientists.
To parent is among the most researched fields in psychology. Many parenting techniques, practices, or traditions were scientifically researched, refined, verified, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for raising a child and information which are supported by science, here is one of my personal favorite science-based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using scientific knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all approach. Every child differs. Even within the best parenting style, there are able to be a variety of effective parenting methods you could choose according to your child's temperament.
A very good example is employing spanking to discipline. There are many better alternatives, time-in, reasoning, e.g. redirection, etc. You are able to choose a non-punitive discipline method that actually works ideal for your child.
Of course, you are able to additionally choose to utilize "traditional" or "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and https://parentinghowto.com/ also may nonetheless get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has found us that kids with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more vulnerable to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a chance with sub par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. Taking science-based parental advice may not be the simplest way to parent. It may require much more work on your part in the temporary but can save you lots of time and agony in the long term.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good point is, that although parenting is hard, it is additionally very rewarding. The bad part is the rewards typically come much later than the effort. But in case we try our best now, we'll ultimately reap the rewards and have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!